I could spend my life in this sweet surrender;
I could stay lost in this moment forever.
Every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure.

Thought of that random song, cos I saw Jerry's MSN PM :D
Neeway, I'm glad to say school wasn't a waste of time today like every other day it was this week.
We had a retreat, Father Simon Pereira and Father Bryan and Edwin and the whole crew came back.
I told myself I wouldn't cry no matter what. But look what happened.

I was the first one to start crying during the reflection time );
Totally suckish, the lights were put out and everyone had their heads down.
Father Simon kept telling us to remove every thing in the world that was making us angry, sad, frustrated, confused right now. And then I started thinking and thinking, and then it hit me so hard. I started crying.
Then Christine came over and hugged me and I felt crushed when she did. I dont know why.

Sang songs, Father Simon let us watch an interview with Ted Bundy.
He's a serial killer and I have a book about him at home, he killed more than 27 woman! :O
Then he told us some ghost stories. About that weird board game and all (ugh reminds me of OCH) and how the ghosts managed to control the moving hands of 10 girls who went and played with it for fun.
And how they all got a bit mad. Screaming & laughing for no reason.
The whole Mamma Mia! record is on the laptop used today. Chiquitita was one of my favourites, and Super Trouper (:

Recess was one hour long. We ate illegally at the gallery.
Christine and I went upstairs to take handphones, and we caught up on the way there.
I told her about the recent things happening to me that she had missed out, and yeah. I felt sad );
Went up to the locker, realised I didn't know Leticia's locker combination to open it and take the phone out -.-
But Germaine managed to hack into it :D Haha.

Went back to the room early, played "Would You Rather?"
Funny how so many Would You Rather questions involved Sheryl Shen and the kutugirl and plucking -.-
Retreat started again :]
Rajali, Anne and Estelle had to do a really funny Indian dance around the room. Super cute. They're so drama. Rajali was the best :D
Then they told us some stories and experiences, some really funny and some really sad.
Monica and Alexis had to go up for roleplay!

Then Father Simon said we were gonna have a healing session and in my mind I was shouting "No no no no please no healing session right now I don't wanna crumble down in front of everyone again."
But we had a session.
The more Father Simon talked, the more the words sunk into my head about letting go, and I started to cry again.
Mithra was next to me and she saw me crying and she took my hand and told me to stop, but I couldn't.
Then, the lights came on again and we had to go round hugging people and stuff.
I was very surprised when Min Min came to me and she was like "Marissa do you remember me!" Then I was like "Yeah!" Then she hugged me and said "I miss you bestfriend!"
And then I started crying even more, cos I hadn't talked to Min Min for more than 1 minute in 3 years.
Then Leticia, Mithra, Janelle, Mariam, Shari and etc came to hug me.

Gosh I think Aurielle's hug has some vibe to start the crying on me.
When she hugged me, tears flowed out more and more. Like omg, Aurielle! :O
Christine was crying a lot too, then Leticia started cos Mel came and apologised to her and she felt bad.
When we had finally all stopped, Pock Ning Nong came over and talked to us and hugged us, and we started crying again.
I guess I ain't the only upset one in this world but at the same time no one knows how I really feel );

Retreat was over, went to the canteen with Mariam. Sat with Steph, Aurielle, Rebecca and Mariam.
Went for choir. Only 3 seniors were there. We started on "Together We Achieve."
I think its an honour to participate in the Youth Special Olympics Singapore 2009 ;D
Some guys and girls from Metta School came over and sang with us.
We were released early and I sooooo badly wanted to go for mass, but then I realised there was only Ascension mass today.
So yuhhh, didn't go.
Took 238 back with Nat Nat (L)
Had a deep talk with her on the way back and I had a whole lot of flashbacks. Some good, some, not-so-good.

Came home, was so tired that I fell asleep and only woke up now (8pm)
I don't feel like eating dinner. No appetite. Ucckkk.

xxx.
Marissa.

What is it with you that makes me act like this?
Its only you, and I gotta get over it.
AND I KNOW WHATS GOING ON. I hear things :]
From people closer to you than you might thinkkkk (: